Admittedly, I am an introvert in
its truest form. I could put a checkmark
next to nearly every description and characteristic of an introvert. I hate small talk and conflict. I much prefer a small group of close friends
to a big party full of strangers. I do
remarkably well without sleep and I almost never take a risk that might not
work out in my favor. In a large group
of people, I tend to observe what is going on around me and listen carefully
while avoiding starting conversations that lack in importance. But, if you ask me if I am an introvert I
would probably respond with a simple “no.”
Why am I so quick to deny who I really am? Why would I choose to pretend to be something
I am not? It is not really a
choice. It is more of a knee-jerk reaction
caused by the negative stigma that society has placed on the word introvert. I grew up in an extrovert dominated world
being taught that being quiet was a bad thing.
Being different from everyone else was a bad thing. Thinking and socializing differently from
everyone else was a bad thing. I needed
to just get over my shyness and be like everyone else. I can't begin to tell you how many
"friends" made me do things I was totally uncomfortable with using
the excuse "You need to learn social skills" or "You need to
learn to not be so shy." So if you
asked me if I was an introvert, I would probably say “No, I am just shy but I
am working on coming out of my shell.”
But why should I have to come out of my shell anyway? Why should I have to change who I am at my
core just to be more like everyone else?
Why should extroverts be the ones
who get to say what is right and what is wrong when it comes to our
personalities?
I do not think there is anything
wrong with being an introvert. I have
never let my shyness get in the way of accomplishing my goals. I do remarkably well in school and I believe
my introverted personality has a direct impact on that. I can be alone and just focus on my work
without getting distracted. I do great
in lecture settings and much prefer individual work over group projects and
presentations. I do not usually like big
social gatherings with many people but I have a few good friends who I am very
close to and who love and appreciate me for who I am. I would not trade them
for anything. I truly hate public
speaking but I will always fight for something I believe in, even if it means
getting up and speaking in front of hundreds of people. Like many other great figures mentioned in Quiet, I have accomplished everything I
hoped for and more not in spite of, but because of my introvert personality. The way I see it, I'm far better off than most
extroverts I know.
Hi Amanda!
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed your post, I am very extroverted so it was good to see how an introverted person feels and thinks! I think its sad you feel like you have to deny who you truly are, or rather that society and culture make you feel like you have to be something you are not. I definitely agreed with the points the author made that educational settings and today's society are pushing for more group work and louder, more outgoing people. Though I agree that is happening, I'm not sure how I feel about how correct and progressive it is. I think there is a perfect place for both introverts and extroverts in education and the workplace! I thought the authors comparisons about public speaking were very amusing, when she was talking about lions watching you and whether they are naked or not, its still scary. I've presented and spoke in front of large crowds many times, and even being as extroverted as I am, I still get nervous! You seem like a great person who is truly introverted, and I hope this book has helped you be more comfortable with your introversion!